Bossy children are taking over American homes by the minute. As a therapist and a single mother of a seven year old daughter, I feel compelled to write about the disturbing and increasing awareness of how out of control our children are today. Everywhere you turn today you find bullies or bossy children telling their parent or your child what to do. I am hard pressed to find a play friend for my daughter for the following reasons:
Parents throw up their hands and say “what can you do?”. Parents think that this “independence” is a good thing that should be rewarded and commended. It may be cute when they are two and not so cute at the age of six and seven. You may not have the backbone to be in charge but your child will develop one fast. It will be detrimental to their development as they grow up.
Being the boss at such a young age is not the genetic makeup of a child. Any child given the opportunity does have the potential to rise up and become the alpha. They have a need for attachment to a caretaker that helps them to feel safe and protected. This is referred to as healthy attachment. They feel safe, secure and protected. If the parent is not there to hold the space and boundaries, the child will assume the role themselves. The child feels lost making it very hard to navigate. It is to much responsibility for the child.
If you find that your the parent of a bossy child and need help getting your kid on track, counseling can benefit you greatly. Teach your child how to be polite and model appropriate behavior. Utilize positive rewards for good behavior and learn the fundamental steps to take back ownership of the home. Kids today have enough pressure on them. Let’s work together to take this role off the child and allow them to feel like a kid again. Seek child counseling today.